I Thought I was Only Kidding When I Called England Nerf™Land.

(And I really have! Here’s the evidence: 2005, and 2006, and I’m sure a couple of other places as well. )

But apparently now they’re doing it for real (h/t Phelps):

Brick Lane made Britain’s first ‘Safe Text’ street with padded lampposts to prevent mobile phone injuries

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Around one in ten careless Brits has suffered a “walk ‘n text” street injury in the past year through collisions with lampposts, bins and other pedestrians.

The 6.6million accidents have caused injuries ranging from mild knocks and embarrassing cuts and bruises through to broken noses, cheekbones and even a fractured skull.

Look, I’ve heard of “Condition White” before, but if you are so disconnected from your surroundings that you walk into lamp posts, then the world doesn’t need to be padded for your protection, you need to be locked in a padded room for ours.

RTWT.

England. Where Great Britain used to be.

EDITED TO ADD: I really hope this story is a joke, because if it isn’t, that nation is just too far gone to save. (And the fact that we can’t tell if it’s satire says that it’s pretty far gone already.)

UPDATE 3/12: Phelps has the scoop. It was a “guerilla marketing” ploy by a wireless service provider – i.e., a joke.

But, as I said, the fact that we couldn’t tell is a sign that England is pretty far gone already. Even reader Phil B. reported that the local (UK) news treated it as real, so they couldn’t tell either.