Once Upon a Time…

…a newspaper journalist was on his way to cover a story when a tire on his car blew out.  He pulled to the shoulder and looked to discover that the passenger-side rear tire was shredded.  So, he popped the trunk and started working on changing it – he was running late.  As he was jacking the car up, he noticed that his car was just a few feet from a very tall, very sturdy fence, and the fence had a sign on it warning not to pick up hitchhikers because inside the fence was a facility for the violently insane.

He spun the lugnuts off the bad wheel and placed them carefully into the hubcap he’d put on the ground nearby, but as he was pulling the bad wheel off, he heard a cough behind him.  Startled, he dropped the blown tire and it fell onto the hubcap, throwing the lugnuts into the air.  When they came down, four of the five rolled directly into a nearby storm drain.

Looking behind him, he saw that a man in a suit and tie was standing just inside the fence, watching.  His hair was perfectly groomed, and he was freshly shaved.  He didn’t look insane.

“Well, hell,” the reporter said, “I’m running late, and now I only have one lug nut to put the spare on with.”

“Simple,” responded the man behind the fence, “take one lug nut off of each of the other three wheels.  That’ll give you four lug nuts per wheel, and that’s enough to get you where you need to go until you can get replacements for the ones you lost.”

A little stunned, the reporter replied, “That’s great!  I’d have never thought of that!  Are you a doctor?”

“No,” the man replied, “I’m one of the patients.”

“But, how could someone as intelligent as you be in there?” the reporter asked.

“I’m insane.  I’m not stupid.”

So we’ve had another rampage shooting, this time in California – land of the Roberti-Roos assault-weapon ban, no “gun show loophole,” “bullet buttons,” magazine capacity restrictions, etc., etc., etc.

And another known nutcase still managed to get his hands on an AR-15 and a bunch of standard capacity magazines, plus a black-powder revolver with a cartridge conversion cylinder.

But one more law will prevent this from happening again!

Which is both insane AND stupid.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.